Pretty pictures- all taken within the last day or so, and none having any relevance to what I wish to talk about :
We went to a funeral yesterday. Not someone we knew well - a father of a friend - he was a year or so older than I am, and we knew him to nod to. So attending his funeral service was, if we're honest about the matter, something of a social duty. I'm sure you'll all know what I mean. Funerals have rather altered their nature over the last few years, certainly in small town life. I'm glad to say that real funerals, i.e. family or friend funerals, haven't really altered, although the details have rather. I should think most blokes keep a black tie, a dark grey suit, a darker grey top coat, and a pair of black shoes in readiness for family funerals. This outfit is known as the subfuscs or the funeral rig. I also keep (and wore yesterday) for 'social funerals' a navy blazer, grey flannels, black shoes, and a suitable tie (regimental or old school does well enough- these work largely because no one ever remembers someone else's old school tie). I remember the first time I wore a school tie at a funeral, and an old friend of mine (ex cavalry and Royal Flying Corps) looked at it and said "I didn't know you were a Desert Rat, Mike.", giving his own age away, as well as grossly exaggerating mine.
I suppose we get to an age when we find there are far too many funerals per annum. It hasn't been too bad this year, but we had a really bad year about seven or eight years ago, when we had to attend about ten funerals in the first half of the year. As the proverbial Irish man is supposed to have said "There were people dying that year who never had before."
I should have said whilst on the subject of funerary clobber, that most of the ladies I know keep the feminine equivalent of dark and gloomy garb in reserve for funerals. I know Ann does, and I think our daughters do, as well. I somehow shouldn't think the grand daughters do, though. (Blow! if my lady readers will excuse the expression -this ridiculous machine has, once again, put itself into italic mode!!!)
Looking round the church yesterday I had a strong impression that nowhere near ALL the blokes attending were wearing black ties. In fact they seemed to be reserved to people of a similar vintage to the dear departed. Do my readers agree with me that funerals are becoming far less formal than of yore?
1 comment:
I remember, many years ago, being slightly surprised when a girl friend of my age (20) wore informal trousers at the funeral of a mutual friend. Sometimes now, bright colours are requested, of course, but I tend still to go down the dark route.
My father's father died in 1952. My father wore a black tie ever after, in mourning, until he died himself in 1970.
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